May 29, 2013

Thoughts of Giving Up-Crossfit is Hard

Everybody goes through cycles in life and that includes ruts. I've been consciously trying to remove negativity and things that bring that into my life out the past year.  My biggest enemy is doubt. "I don't think I can" and "I'm not good enough"  are the worst demons I have in my head (which never seems to shut up).  Yesterday was one of those days where I just could not shake them.

I've been trying to get on a sleep, workout, life schedule the past couple of weeks and failing. I can't seem to make it to bed early enough, get up in the morning to workout so it's done for the day, or get things done off my long to-do list. I haven't even blogged much. I don't want to tell everyone that no, I'm not doing 2 a day workouts like you, or seeing ab progress, or eating 100% clean, or rocking my workouts, or getting enough sleep. 

Then yesterday I went to crossfit after having a couple of weeks of only making it 2x a week and going on vacation. We were trying the rope climb for the strength WOD.  I could barely get my initial stance on the rope let alone actually climb it. Yes, I have never climbed a rope before so I didn't know what to expect.  Still, I looked at all these other strong girls, most who could at least get up the rope a little bit and some who could climb the whole things.  

They had strong muscles and backs and toned bodies and could do the WODs Rx.  Then for our WOD there were deadlifts and burpees over the bar.  I did my deadlift with 90 lb (Rx was 100) which was challenging for me.  Multiple times the coach had to tell me to watch my back position and eventually on the last set come over and help me fix it. 


 I know crossfit is all about personal progress and only competing with yourself but still I felt embarrassed. I was the only one who needed correction and help on the deadlifts. Then I start wondering what everyone thinks of me.  Am I not coming to crossfit enough? Is it maybe not for me? When am I going to progess? Maybe I am just bad at crossfit. I came home and started to cry when my boyfriend asked me how my workout was. 


nike-women-quote-make-yourself
from Nike Women

  Today is a new day, and I thought about skipping crossfit and going for a run but no. I need to prove to myself that I don't suck everyday and that maybe today's class will be better. 

If you are having a rough week with some skipped workouts, numerous treats, less sleep than usual, and stress which usually comes with the end of the school year and beginning of summer, I'm here to tell you to take a deep breathe, refocus, and be positive.  It's all we can do when we're feeling less than our best!

Here's some motivation for you and me today! 

What do you do when you are in a rut?


christian-larson-quote

patience-spirtual-inspiration-quote

quote-jon-acuff


22 comments:

  1. I throw myself a pity party for a few minutes and then I tell myself that it's ok. There will ALWAYS be someone better/stronger/faster/more talented. I have to worry about being the best me, not the best everyone else.

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    1. Yeah everyone needs a self-pity party every once in a while. I think I need to remember that just being there and trying is worth something too!

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  2. I allow myself a wallow, but just remember that tomorrow is a new day and make the decision to adjust my attitude. I had one of those days yesterday. Attitude is everything!

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    1. I agree-that's why I went back to Crossfit today and had a slightly better class!

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  3. It's hard to admit things aren't "perfect" in our lives. But at the same time, it's crazy for us to be afraid to admit that we aren't eating as many fruits and veggies as we probably should, or hitting the gym enough times, to the internet. We should be allowed to voice those opinions, if only to help us stay accountable for ourselves. I get really down on myself all the time by comparing myself to others but i know I'm happier when I don't. Just know you're not alone in that- everyone is worried about something they're doing "wrong" and are probably comparing themselves to something you're doing "right."

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    1. Thanks for this, it's just hard when you are constantly bombarded on social media with everyone's eats and workouts! I love how you always keep it real, lady!

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  4. Keep your head up, we are our worst critics!!

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  5. I'm right there with Carrie, we are our own worst critics. I saw a quote recently about accepting being a beginner because we are only a beginner once. Take it slow and allow your body the time to make big strides. It will come. I just did a deadlift and double under wod and I could only do 55kg. I've never Rx'ed anything yet and I definitely can't climb the rope... let alone hang on to it lol. I still can't do a stupid double under. My arms look like my husband is a wife beater. So just remember that we need to accept where we are and take it one day at a time. Don't force yourself to do more than you can. You will get there. You will get stronger!

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    1. Thanks. I looked back and realized I haven't been doing it for too long and that matters. I used to never use a barbell or practice pullups so that IS something big! Thanks for putting it into perspective for me. It's just hard sometimes to focus on me and not compare. I will get strong because I keep showing up and trying!

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  6. I love this post because I have totally been there and felt this way...many times. You're already a step ahead of most people because you've realized that you can get through it. And you definitely motivated me!

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    1. Wow glad to motivate someone! I was hesitant to write this for fear of being too whiny or sad or not strong enough. The strength is inside you!

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  7. Don't give up. Nobody is perfect! Nobody.

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  8. Good for you for pushing yourself. I've been in the same boat lately, and nothing works better than self-motivation. Keep on keepin'!

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    1. Thanks, all you can do is keep trying!

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  9. Love the honesty of this post. I have a friend who gives me the best advice all the time (pardon the French): "F*uck pride. Pride only hurts." So maybe you'll go to Crossfit and suck everytime (although I doubt that :) ) - it doesn't matter because that pride is only gonna keep you weak! You're awesome - keep it up - just throw those feelings to the side and remember the only way to get stronger is to keep going!

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    1. Yes that's why I'm trying to get some confidence in the box and keep myself in control!

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  10. Go rock it!!! You got this!

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